Dear Ryan-

As night time comes, as it does every night, I miss you more and more. I miss everything about you. To the point it hurts emotionally and physically. To feel your warm embrace, or slow dance in our underwear to the dead silence, or even if it be just lay on your bed. To be with you, brings greater joy to my heart than I could ever imagine. Our past memories help me sleep at night, yet keep me up. I play the first day with you, over and over again. The first time you reached for my hand, at the time I gave you my hand but as I sit here now, I gave you so much more than a simple hand, I gave you my soul. The first time we kissed, I didn’t just press my lips against yours ever so softly, but I gave you half of me. Half of everything of me. My heart, my hopes, my dreams, and my future. As I sit here now, all I can do is cry knowing that my other half, hurts and is so far away. I’m sorry I’m not the best. I’m sorry I am pessimistic at times, that sometimes I start stupid fights, that sometimes I take you for granted. I’m sorry for all I do. But one thing I will never be sorry for, is loving you. Because until our dying day, my heart will belong to you, and solely you. 

-C